Attention: Even the generally well-informed architecture magazine Bauwelt warns about the working conditions at Opposite Office:
WORK AT OPPOSITE OFFICE?!
At them moment we don't have any open positions at Opposite Office You are welcome to apply on your own initiative with a portfolio/video link or in any other form, but please read this text first and watch the video from a former employee.
Hello dear applicants, welcome to the world of the Opposite Office architectural firm – the place where your dreams of leisure and pension rights will be put to the ultimate test! Are you thinking about applying to us? Stop, stop! We have put together a few good reasons why you might want to leave it alone:
1. High level of expertise: At Opposite Office we set the bar high - so high that we sometimes have difficulty getting over it ourselves. If you're not willing to push your abilities to the limit, then this is definitely not the place for you.
2. Lots of overtime: free time? A foreign word. With us, every day becomes an epic adventure full of unpaid overtime. After all, we not only develop buildings, but also our sleep deficits!
3. Unpaid non-commercial projects: As we all know, money doesn't stink, but sometimes it smells like the tears of our creativity. Our projects are so non-commercial that even money itself decides to stay away.
4. No board of directors: hierarchy? Not with us! We believe that decisions are best made when no one makes them. Sounds complicated? Welcome to Opposite Office.
5. Flat hierarchies: Yes, you heard that right. Our hierarchies are flatter than a flounder. If you're looking for someone to bring coffee to, just look in the mirror.
6.No proper HR: Our HR department is so relaxed that it doesn't even exist. Problems are simply ignored until they resolve themselves - a proven method that works brilliantly for us.
7. No pension rights: Retirement? This sounds like a fairy tale that only exists in another dimension. We work hard until our pension is forgotten.
But don't worry, there's good news too! If you're looking for a place to express your limitless creativity, love of long hours, and ability to embrace unpaid projects, then Opposite Office is the place for you. With that in mind – good luck finding the perfect workplace, but remember: at Opposite Office, the staircase to success is a slippery water slide! 🚀 If you still can't help it, feel free to send us an email, but don't expect a response.
P.S. All applications that begin with "Dear Hiring Manager" or "To whom it may concern" will go straight into the trash and will not be answered.